Saturday, February 23, 2008

How to control slutty animals

For those of you dismayed when your pets, neighborhood toms and other sexually promiscuous wild-life insist on cavorting around despite the excellence of "abstinence only" education, the fine folks at Texas A & M have a cure for those animals lack of headache: oral contraceptives. Like hormonal contraceptives used in humans, these drugs prevent an ova from being fertilized while maintaining that annoying cycle that serves as a reminder to females that their uterus is what matters and the rest is dispensible
"This approach inhibits maturation of the egg and therefore prevents fertilization. The animals continue to cycle, so it will not yet be ideal for many pet owners. But there is an advantage for use in wild and feral animals." [Duane Kramer, Professor of Veterinary Physiology & Pharmacology]
Phosphdiesterase inhibitors are the first class of drugs being evaluated for this purpose. It will likely be mixed with feed so, if they pharmacodynamic effects of the PDE inhibitors are similar to those in humans, you'll know which animals have been exposed by the increase in the music they make.

Unfortunately, Dr. Zaius was not available for comment at the time of posting


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